Free thoughts

It ought to be, but full confidentiality almost impossible when you are in hospital. We draw the curtains around, but they are not sound proof. I was just on the computer reading some patient notes when I overheard a pastor talking to one of the patients. It touched me. She has a terminal cancer and she has been low in mood and been angry at everyone ever since I first met her. She asked the pastor 'do you think I will live?'. The pastor said he doesn't know but everyone dies. The pastor then said a prayer with her. He blessed her and all the patients in this hospital, and all the doctors and all the nurses and every who have been looking after her. I'm not a Christian and I'm not particularly religious but it made me choke, it was very moving that our efforts are being appreciated and people remember us in their prayers. The student nurse who was also there and I looked at each other, I think we share the same feeling.

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He is recovering from a really bad chest infection. Part of the examination requires looking into the sputum pot. It was very unusual this morning. It is very watery light brown, not sputum like at all. We just wonder if he has been pouring the yakult probiotic drink into the sputum pot.

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Another death in the ward. Elderly patient with metastatic cancer. I did not expect him to go so quickly but obviously I haven't been experienced enough to anticipate death. We were treating him for his heart failure and chest infection, and I remember he smiled at me everytime I looked at him even with him being so poorly. Nice people like this shouldn't die.

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