The lump on the back of my skull beside my right ear is back again. Is that just an indication of stress? or is it a growing tumour?!?
i feel so extremely sad today. my EE is again REJECTED!!!!!!! sigh....this is the fourth proposal i've done. i put my heart and soul in doing each and every proposal...i've lost my soul for four times already.
CD Club is also a source of stress...it's so distressing that i don't want to think of it anymore.
I have so many things to take care of: taman megah, exam, IRP revision, Group 4 experiments, blablabla.... i'm getting sick..it's not surprising that one day, i'd turn out to be a Jeha...
However, i'm trying to retain my cool and control myself emotionally.
Looking forward to a brighter day!
Wednesday, April 28
Saturday, March 20
today is an extremely depressing day.......i'm very very very very very sad, depressed, disappointed, upset and angry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was supposed to go and volunteer in the mobile clinic with MERCY. I wanted to go there so much. Community service is sort of like my passion. I take pleassure in doing things like that. i don't know why but i simply feel happy and not tired while doing my jobs. And i meet people of same interest (which, i have to admit that it's very rare among today's society, or rather among people i know), people with the same wavelength in mind. To sum it all, i just adore volunteering very very much.
But the sad thing is that i don't get the family, particularly parental support that i need... My mother is like totally against it. She doesn't even like me going out, even going out to supermarket and shopping mall by public transport with friends. Com on...i'm already 19. Why do i forever have to be mummy's girl, stuck at home all day? i believe i earn the right and freedom to go wherever i want and do whatever i like as i am old enough already. All my life, i'm been staying at home while my friends will tell me stories of how they've enjoyed travelling across the country with classmates, celebrating people's birthday till 12 midnight and sleepovers, taking bus all alone to meet cousins and boyfriends etc. what can i do? i wasn't really hurt because i'm not really into all these. But i'd really appreciate if she'd allow me to persue my interest in medicine and community service...it's not wastage of time like lepaking in malls, i'll be there to help people, lend them a helping hand. What's so terrible about that?
I don't know about tomorrow but i'm gonna be really angry today at her!
But the sad thing is that i don't get the family, particularly parental support that i need... My mother is like totally against it. She doesn't even like me going out, even going out to supermarket and shopping mall by public transport with friends. Com on...i'm already 19. Why do i forever have to be mummy's girl, stuck at home all day? i believe i earn the right and freedom to go wherever i want and do whatever i like as i am old enough already. All my life, i'm been staying at home while my friends will tell me stories of how they've enjoyed travelling across the country with classmates, celebrating people's birthday till 12 midnight and sleepovers, taking bus all alone to meet cousins and boyfriends etc. what can i do? i wasn't really hurt because i'm not really into all these. But i'd really appreciate if she'd allow me to persue my interest in medicine and community service...it's not wastage of time like lepaking in malls, i'll be there to help people, lend them a helping hand. What's so terrible about that?
I don't know about tomorrow but i'm gonna be really angry today at her!
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